The Courage to Stop Waiting for Permission

"If you don't listen to yourself, you'll always be waiting for someone else..." -Unknown

So often, women including myself--feel stuck, we sense that something just isn't working in our lives, but we are unsure exactly what it is and what to do about it.

We start asking familiar questions: Should I change my work? My relationships? Do I need to do something completely different?

On one hand, we feel we should be grateful for what we have and perhaps even feel selfish for wanting something different. On the other hand, we feel unhappy with a quiet gnawing feeling inside telling us that something needs to change.

That's when we find ourselves hesitating--frozen with indecision, doing nothing about it while time passes us by.

In coaching, we don't start by having our clients make big decisions--we start by getting curious. We become detectives, looking for small clues, seeing where the energy is, and watching for patterns to emerge...and they always do.

Often, clients are surprised when something comes up that has been hidden for a long time. Something she had long forgotten about. Perhaps it was how much she missed sketching landscapes in the park or wanting to start her own online business.

These small inklings begin to wake up a part of ourselves that we've ignored or pushed away.

The key is to take the time to start listening to the clues inside you. Journaling can often provide a way to bypass your inner critic and allow your answers to emerge.

Try this: Over the next few days, pay attention to what is persistently trying to get your attention. Then ask yourself:

• What is one interest or idea I've quietly dismissed--even though it continues to show up?

• Where in my life am I still waiting for approval instead of trusting what feels right for me?

• Who will I disappoint if I go after what I want?

You don't need to act on this right away. Self-trust grows when you allow yourself to notice what truly interests and energizes you--without dismissing it or explaining it away.

"Trust yourself. You know more than you think you do." -Benjamin Spock